love the life you live and cherish the memories you’ve gathered. thus the gift of god. no one can take it away from you and separates you from the rest. amen — willquach
hello to anyone that’s still reading. i’ve been receiving tons of positive feedback on my writing and since tumblr is growing so rapidly, i just thought i’d start writing for whomever still enjoys honest, heartfelt, and heavy compositions. thanks you guys!
since my last post, i’ve been on the road to recovery. not completely leaving the mood but have moved from that eerie mindset. unconstrained and shaking these ropes off my heart and slowly separating from this dark antithesis that many have seen these past few months. similiar to spiderman and venom. negative thoughts and intentions can drastically, and at times permanency, change one’s self image, mindset, and expectations for the future. time to move past what happened and pay undying attention to what is truly wanted and a plan to achieve a set goal. yes we all have untold thoughts that set us back and at times it’s too great of a hurdle to conquer but i know it wouldn’t be my true self if i embraced the hurdle with open arms. always moving forward and never lean back on the dark support that i’ve always depended on.
i do still feel for the ill to the thoughts i have but not as much as i did before. i know that you wouldn’t want me to spend my time squandering the dark outskirts of my mind but it’s only to keep your memory alive. things we’ve done, places we’ve been, and times we’ve had. i miss you grandma. i miss you allen. always with me and forever with me through times of great peril. i would give anything to have you grow old with me. anything for you to watch me grow, progress, and watch me encompass any and all goals my heart ever desired.
i had a dream last night. it was a story. a story told by a symphony of past, present, and promising future thoughts. a chair in the middle of a field. a field filled with memories. cherished and regretted memories. i could feel cheer all around me. applauding the good times and gripping the warmth that surrounded me. i told myself, these are the times to enjoy. these are the times to embrace. these are the times to live by. never to wander back into the dark depths and surround myself in melancholy. to take back the love i have for myself. to redeem and to flourish.
1. abounding in vigour and high spirits; full of vitality.
a word to accept and a word to carry with you today. hoped you enjoyed me pep-talking myself! :3
i wish i were blind. not being able to see the world that slowly tears me apart. day by day, the things i see makes me want to give up on this mere reality that society calls life. nothing but empty hopes and a pointless existence. seeking for things that aren’t there and improving on lost conviction. diving into my own vessel that has no final destination. a final solitude. a everlasting journey to an oblivion. a lone path that i see fit for my intention to find myself and to eject all distractions from leading me down another hopeless route. tired of this life. wallowing in misery and sinking into a glorious decline. non-existent passion follows a non-existent soul. no one understands and no one will ever comprehend a fraction of what haunts my apotheosis. that is all for today.
hello to anyone that still reads my posts. i know i’ve been out of the tumblr scene but i haven’t stop writing. just decided to put more personal content into a paper journal.
my life has completely turned around for the worst part.
so much has happened in these past two weeks. i can’t even concentrate on forming a composition of any sort.
rest in peace to my grandmother. the only woman that ever understood me and the only woman that i’ll ever love. no one will ever understand. i know you are always with me. i miss you so much.
i will continue this post at another time.
fuck me please. i’ll pay you in the morning. — williamquach
read if you feel like giggling to yourself.
life is good. — jesus christ
so haven’t been home the past few days and enjoying them. probably fuck me later but oh well I’M GRADUATING SCHOOL BIATCH!! so yeah already starting a career soon and hopefully that’ll take me somewhere i want to be.
in other news, i reactivated my facebook account yesterday and oh boy, i’ve never talked to so many people at one time in many MANY months. i’ll probably deactivate it really soon since i’m already showing side-effects of fb-turns-your-brain-into-mush syndrome. just got on it to update the people that still remembers me about my graduation. IT’S THIS COMING UP THURSDAY MAY 13TH AT 7PM if you want to come support me on my journey across the stage!
been a very stressful week though. you can’t have all the good without the bad. let’s just say i totally out-douched myself in front of the only person i’d never thought i’d be a douche to. totally regret it and hopefully god will answer my prayers.